SomeRedDame on DeviantArthttps://www.deviantart.com/somereddame/art/Head-Trouble-481630984SomeRedDame

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Head Trouble

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Vent art

Worst part about being disabled and dealing with mental illnesses like anxiety, depression, or high-functioning autism is when it's not visible or apparent. And often with good reason, as you're intentionally trying and struggling so hard to pass for 'normal' (because everyone else seems to do it, sometimes even people who seem to quite frankly have it far worse off than you!) Surely -you- can function, you're perfectly fine. But it's a constant fight, and often feels like you have nowhere to go. Most days, you feel trapped inside your own head. You can't bear to speak up, either as the criticisms already block out rationality with their dull roar, and a thousand thoughts are running through your head, things people have said either to you or to situations like yours are taken personally and repeated en masse, even amplified in the distortion of your mind. Coupled with your own insecurities and struggles, these turbulent thoughts manifest themselves as physical impediments to your life, affecting work, socializing, relationships, even basic functions like driving, eating, sleeping and even physical ability.
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yzkethrag's avatar
Oh yes, head trouble, I know those.
Constant streams of brooding thoughts about pretty much everything, the ones that keeps you up at night silently sobbing to yourself because millions "what if" is crashing down inside your mindscape at lightspeed, static buzz of the mind, of doubt and anxieties, random floods of despairing sadness oh and moments "out of the blue" shell-shocking madness that makes you feel like "I would like to laugh, because I can't cry, and even though I try there won't come any tears."
Oh yes, I know head troubles.
Which is where all my poetry and art comes from in all it's absolute insane glory, 'cause I gotta let it out somehow, let it go away and in someway, if I don't; well, I might just pop, short-circuit, throw the towel in, take the Crazy Train ect metaphorical statement galore.
I would like to apologize for the jestering attitude, it's alll I got;
"If you can't cry at the horrors of the world, then LAUGH! LAUGH AT IT UNTIL THE WORLD STARTS TO TURN AROUND, LAUGH UNTIL THE WORLD BURNS ALL AROUND! LAUGH UNTIL IT KILLS YOU, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN!" - The Joker probably [citation confirmation needed]
So yeah, head troubles, that's bad stuff.
Also, rambling like a madman.